How's it hanging Phil?

[smngry]

Surely Phil could have used his hands to cushion the blow.

Just an idea

[Spanky]

Yeah, that kind of bugs me too at times. I just figured he was in too much shock and awe to do anything, but still kind of seems weak. I would have been flailing and squirming as much as possible instead of just hang there. You figure with that much he could have diverted the fall from his neck. But then again, they wanted Phil to die that way, so I guess that's how they wanted to do it.

[Deleted]

Chucky: "How's it hanging Phil?"

Phil: "Not too bad. The wife has been on my ass lately making it impossible to even talk to her. I lost my job and I have yet to tell her and I don't feel like going back back up there to look at her plain Jane, whiney, infurtle face anymore... you mind helping me out here?"

Chucky: "Yeah no problem... that's what friends are for"

Phil: "Thanks Tommy"

Chucky: "The names Chucky"

Phil: "Sorry... Chucky" turns his head over to Andy. "Hey Andy, look at that. You were right all along. Sucks to be you because I dont think ahhh...."

CRACK!

[Spanky]

Yeah, maybe Phil was in deep to some loan sharks or something for his gambling habit. And Joanne always gave him slack for coming home smelling like cheap scotch and glitter every night.

[Deleted]

Yeah... we really don't know what went on behind those closed doors. We didn't get to see that there was some serious psychological issues at hand and that Phil and Joanne were really the trashiest of white trash in suburban clothing.

We didn't get to see that Kyle was shooting up to make the pain of Phil's perversions go away, and that Andy was starting to like boys, torture small animals, and wash in the shower with a brillo pad to wash away the sin. We weren't treated to Joanne's habits of sleeping with all kinds of different men whilst Phil was at work and constantly having abortions to keep it from Phil and telling him she was incapable of having children.  

Last we have Chucky who is a tormented soul who was bullied and tortured and really just needs someone to reach out to him. All he wanted was his family back after he lost them in the fire and took his vengence out on those who had it better than him.

Ladies and Gentleman... I present to you Rob Zombie's Child's Play 2


 

[Spanky]

Damn that's harsh, I know you don't like Zombie, but dang, lol.

But the Simpsons were definitely good people, but they have had a lot of bad luck in their day, which is pretty much why Phil is a jerk. Also, Joanne seemed like a stay-at-home-wife, and her and Phil definitely didn't look like they were any short on money or finances, so Phil probably had some really good job that paid him well, but took it's toll on him. He probably spent many evenings in strip clubs with the clients from Japan in order to close the merger.